Ask yourself “How do you ACT and FEEL when you don’t trust someone?”…
Do you act/feel similarly to the people in the video?
- Crossing the street
- Avoiding people
- Becoming quiet
- Avoid eye contact
- Becoming self-focused
- Not engaging openly
- Double thinking their motivations
- Physiological arousal, sweating, heart beating fast
- Safety seeking
- Holding back
- Self protection
- Uncomfortable unpleasant
- Unable to be yourself
- Careful of what you say
- Reflecting on yourself “Do I trust this person?”
- Questioning their trustworthiness
- Questioning your actions and words more
- Picking up on things you usually wouldn’t - Tone of voice, words, actions, how things are directed towards you (or not)
- Suspicious behaviour
- Looking out for things that confirm our lack of trust
- Looking for actions that confirm your beliefs
At the end of the video, you will have heard me explaining that this was simply a question about trust, but I’m sure most will agree that there is a high correlation between the way people behave when they don’t trust someone, and the way black/brown people get treated every day in the UK.
For young black boys, white people regularly cross the street to avoid making eye contact with them, and clutch their belongings extra tight. Unfortunately this is an all too regular occurrence in the UK and beyond.
Many white people become tense and nervous around black people, and this can manifest itself in many different ways according to the individual. Some may overshare, and will not be able to stop talking - others may become quiet and defensive, listening and looking out for actions that confirm their beliefs.
Reflect on your own experience, have you ever been the only member of your race in the room? If so how did you act/feel? Was it similar to how you act/feel when you don’t trust someone?